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About Digital Art / Hobbyist Neil RawsonMale/United States Group :iconjetcampaign: JetCampaign
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Deviant for 9 Years
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Statistics 208 Deviations 3,951 Comments 24,783 Pageviews

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The Walking Derp by NeilRawson The Walking Derp :iconneilrawson:NeilRawson 1 0
A Broken Dream
Some time ago, I was far away from home.  I had returned to the place where I met the girl I once considered to be the love of my life.  I had lived here with her, once.  It was the happiest time of my life.  But we hadn't been together in months.  Our relationship died when I returned home, and we both decided it was for the best.  That didn't make things easy, though.  It had been a long winter.
We stood at the edge of the forest at the back of her property.  The land was divided by a huge chainlink fence, stuck in the middle of a huge trench.  This place was usually warm, but somehow, the ground was still covered in several feet of hard snow, leftover from the winter.  How strange, I thought to myself.  It would've been a very harsh winter for this place to have any snow at all, let alone in May.  I looked up and down the length of the fence.  It was abou
:iconneilrawson:NeilRawson 0 0
That Badman Peach by NeilRawson That Badman Peach :iconneilrawson:NeilRawson 1 2 Vengeance by NeilRawson
Mature content
Vengeance :iconneilrawson:NeilRawson 1 2
Awakening by NeilRawson Awakening :iconneilrawson:NeilRawson 4 6 Bubba and Jerry preview by NeilRawson Bubba and Jerry preview :iconneilrawson:NeilRawson 0 0 Shelter by NeilRawson Shelter :iconneilrawson:NeilRawson 2 0 Myah! by NeilRawson Myah! :iconneilrawson:NeilRawson 2 0
Once in Awhile
Once in awhile there comes a time
You lose yourself within yourself
Even time ceases to breathe.
Feeling so indifferent
As though the world could combust
And you wouldn't miss a breath.
Waiting, apathetic,
Like a whisper found on deaf ears,
For something to change.
Falling into a silent stupor
And knowing what a cold year
This is going to be.
It's easy to kill an hour
When all you have to do is
Close your eyes.
Take a cursed breath,
Smiling in ironic contempt,
It won't be your last.
Watch the years float by
Through eyelids so heavy,
The wind seems to drone.
Listless as you realize
That the sun has set,
And you're not even awake.
Feeling numb yet oddly smug.
It's hard when you're the only one
Smirking at your own dry jokes.
Sometimes it's easy to forget
That it's okay to feel...
Once in awhile.
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Pro-Death by NeilRawson
Mature content
Pro-Death :iconneilrawson:NeilRawson 1 0
Flying Spaghetti Monster by NeilRawson Flying Spaghetti Monster :iconneilrawson:NeilRawson 2 0 Gorgeous by NeilRawson
Mature content
Gorgeous :iconneilrawson:NeilRawson 0 0
Nightmare by NeilRawson Nightmare :iconneilrawson:NeilRawson 3 0 Dream by NeilRawson Dream :iconneilrawson:NeilRawson 5 2 Djinn ID by NeilRawson Djinn ID :iconneilrawson:NeilRawson 0 0 Dark 'Tana by NeilRawson Dark 'Tana :iconneilrawson:NeilRawson 1 0

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  • Listening to: Goo Goo Dolls - Here is Gone
  • Reading: Not often enough
  • Watching: The Crow
  • Playing: Paper Mario
  • Eating: S'mores
  • Drinking: Iced tea
After nearly a year of not submitting any new content, I'm officially ready to call it quits on this account. Not to say I don't have some decent work, but I've grown up a lot since I made this account. My style has changed so much that I hardly would feel comfortable placing my current work with what I used to have. But a lot of people have loved my old work, especially my old stamps, so I'll keep the page up. If you want to see me now, visit me at ThatBadmanPeach.

Peace always,


Neil Rawson
Artist | Hobbyist | Digital Art
United States
I thought about writing a really well thought-out page about myself and the important things in my life. Instead, I typed out a ton of random paragraphs that basically sum up me in a nutshell, which I continue to keep adding to. It's very long. I should probably make a short version of it. Honestly, this is written more for me than anyone else. If you read it, I hope you enjoy it, in some odd way.

I love music and art in just about any form. I play guitar, bass, harmonica, mandolin, sitar, and tablas. (Google those last two if you're not sure.) I have artistic roots on both sides of my family, which have greatly shaped my entire way of life. I listen to all sorts of music: rock of all types, metal, grunge, alternative, blues, jazz, swing, soul, funk... and then obscure stuff, like traditional world music, and really old blues. Even genres I don't listen to, I can respect and even appreciate. It's all artistic in its own way. While I don't specialize in any one type of art, I'm always trying out different mediums of personal expression. I always seem to fall back on writing, although I tend to be inconsistent with it.

I'm not going to college yet, if at all. After having spent two thirds of my life trying to get OUT of school, I wasn't really in any hurry to go back, and I'm still not. I never really applied myself in high school, and I was told I never lived up to my potential. But I don't regret it. My heart just wasn't in it, and I think if I were to go back school now, I'd just end up wasting it. I have a diploma, and that apparently means something.

I like food. Especially Mexican or Asian(-American) food. I like a lot of strange, obscure foods most people wouldn't appreciate. Like chow mein noodles, crystallized grapefruit, rooibos tea, and generic-brand cola. And make me a Fluffernutter and I'll love you forever. My tongue doesn't really know of any "bad" tastes, just strange or interesting ones. As a young kid, I always wanted to be a chef when I grew up. Occasionally, that dream still presents itself as a viable option. I love cooking. I suppose in a way, I view everything in my life as a recipe. It's all about taking basic components and finding the synergy to make them work together in balance. My current job is cooking at McDonald's, and while I'm certainly not at the top of the culinary ladder, (in fact, I'm not even sure if I'm at the bottom rung,) I'm still making tasty food that I can be (relatively) proud to serve.

I do just as well in isolation as I do with others, although I'm a lot more social now than I was as a kid. Or maybe not social so much as socially confident. I've met some really awesome people in my life, and I'm very fortunate to have the friends that I do. There are a lot of people I care about, but sadly, I'm not very good at staying in touch. I've been known to just cut off all communication with people... for no reason, and with no warning. I'm getting better about it. On that note, I'm single, though I prefer the term "ridin' solo." And I love it... though I must admit: I have a real soft spot for beautiful redheads. Seriously. And women who can sing, draw, or play an instrument get tons of bonus points.

I find the world around me to be a strange and interesting place, and appreciate the little things others take for granted. I love trying out new or exotic things... and not-so-exotic things. Anything to stimulate my senses in new ways. Every day, I try to experience something new. Or at least experience SOMETHING. Sometimes I think maybe I'm just easily amused. Life is just not long enough to do and see everything that could appeal to me. I don't believe in being bored. I pity people who say they always are. The concept is hard for me to grasp. However, that isn't to say that I'm not excellent at wasting time. I love burning incense while listening to trance. Meditation is cool. From time to time, I'd even consider myself a borderline Secular Buddhist. Call me a hippie if you want. I miss my long hair. I might grow it back out before I go bald. I wish I could have a beard again, but food service jobs generally don't allow it.

I have a lot of interest in the natural world. Camping is awesome. I love rain, especially thunderstorms. That includes being out in it. And morning fog. That sort of thing. I prefer summer over winter. Winter is just downright depressing most of the time. Heat is okay with me. I'm a total softie when it comes to animals. Furry, scaly, big, small, doesn't matter. I don't think I've ever met an animal I didn't grow to like. However, I'm not a vegetarian, and I don't oppose hunting. I love eating meat too much. I know it's hypocritical.

I'm a creature of the night. I find it's much easier to think and function while the rest of the world is busy sleeping. I can't really explain why. Driving around town, or going into whatever stores are open in the middle of the night, is my idea of a night out. On that note, I love long car rides by myself. It gives me time to think and just enjoy life. If gas didn't cost anything, I'd drive 1,000 miles a week if I could. I'm one of those weirdos you see wearing a trench coat, weighing out bulk candy and comparing fabric softeners at 3 in the morning. Of course, I'm just as happy sitting in, watching classic silent horror movies all night. Staying up until the sun rises is an interesting, meaningful thing for me. Sleep is overrated; my mind seldom shuts off completely anyways. I just stay alive by consuming large quantities of beef jerky and energy drinks, and napping often. I think dreams are intriguing, and in my case, nearly always downright strange. I just wish I was better at remembering them. Usually they consist of me and a group of friends pulling off some sort of heist, or uncovering some great secret, while living on the road, or in a strange, distant land. But it's always night time, and I'm always on the move. Which I really kinda like. I don't even mind nightmares. Inception is my all-time favorite movie, hands-down.

I get all nostalgic when it comes to '90s stuff. The music, the shows, the clothes, the memorabilia... Grunge, Pokémon, and Nintendo 64 will always have a special place in my heart. Sometimes I wish I could be maybe five years older, so I could've been old enough to really appreciate that decade at its peak. I love watching all those old cartoons on Netflix - Rocko's Modern Life, Ren and Stimpy, Hey Arnold... and as an adult, I have a true appreciation for some of the tongue-in-cheek humor they used. Or in the case of Beavis in Butthead, whatever type of humor you could call that. I just wish Netflix had all the vintage commercials, too, if only for nostalgia's sake. It's kind of a dream in the back of my mind to create my own cartoon someday, based on my crazy experiences working in hospital food service. It'll probably never happen, but it would certainly be interesting, and I'd never run out of material for inspiration. Oh, and by the way... REESE'S FOR BREAKFAST?!?

I'm not at all religious. In fact, I'm quite the opposite. Depending on my current mood, I'm not even "spiritual," as people put it. While the concepts of life, death, and humanism are fascinating to me, I don't consider myself to be a morbid nor "deep" person. I've probably said some pretty nasty things about your religion at some point or another, assuming you have one, and I'm not sorry for it. I hope it doesn't offend you, but that's not going to change. Please don't try to convert me. I value logic over faith. I don't believe supernatural things exist, only things that cannot yet be explained by science. I also believe that humans should be good for the sake of being good, rather than out of fear of eternal damnation or because a jolly man in the sky wants us to. People should be free to do and feel whatever they want, as long as it doesn't hurt anyone. Here's a fun fact, though: I am a legitimate Reverend of the Church of Universal Life. I even have the paperwork to prove it. That means I have the power to absolve you of your sins I don't believe in. Neat, huh? (I suppose I should mention here that I'm also a semi-proud Pastafarian.)

I also don't care much for politics. Same goes for arguing about them. I have my own hybrid system of values and morality, though overall, I consider myself to be more liberal than conservative. I value progress over tradition. But I'm too indifferent to most issues to pay too much attention. I feel like the majority of politicians are more or less corrupt, anyways. I love America, truly, though you're not going to see me putting a vinyl American flag on my car, or a bald eagle tattoo across my chest. Democracy and freedom are awesome values, and life here really is pretty good most of the time. This country definitely has its flaws, but I blame that mostly on the herd mentality and poor morale of the people within it.

I don't often drink, smoke, or take any other mind-altering substances. For many people, that's hard to understand. To put it simply, I prefer being in charge of my own mind as much as I can be. But I also don't live in fear of those things.

I don't really have any conscious fears... except eating ketchup. And maybe public restrooms. I'm actually kinda reckless a lot of the time, probably too much for my own good. While I don't believe in fate or destiny, I also don't fear the future. I'd rather take chances from time to time and live an enjoyable, adventurous life. People who live in fear can never truly experience freedom.

Sometimes I ramble, even in text. Well, okay, especially in text. I have too many thoughts to be concise. I just try to keep it more or less relevant in the scheme of things. So yeah. Moving on. This one might seem out of place, but I am a mighty pirate. I pity those of you who count yourselves among the ninjas. Yarrr.

I'm a bit of a pack rat. I like collecting strange, sometimes useless things, especially if they have a strong artistic, cultural, or "earthy" feel to them. I might even have a minor hoarding problem. I also have a thing for various hats. I've found that thrift stores are a great way to collect relics of value to no one but me. Material possessions don't really mean anything, I know, and if it all disappeared in a heartbeat, I'd still be me. But they're cool to have if you can put a meaning to them. I don't have a lot of money, but I'm happy with what I do have. In fact, I hate money. I'm so sick of hearing people talk about it. Unfortunately, it's hard to live without in today's world, and that's the cold reality. However, I'd rather be poor and content than rich and empty. Honestly, I'd love to just throw a guitar in the back of a Winnebago and live my life on the road, doing odd jobs to make just enough to survive. I've been told time and time again that it's impossible, but it's a dream. I certainly don't want to spend the rest of my life washing dishes in a windowless room.

I'm a total geek when it comes to the trading card game Magic: The Gathering. I've been known to dump countless hours into making a perfect deck. In my childhood, I was the same way with video games, but I don't play them much, anymore. I can't even rightly call myself a "gamer," by modern gaming standards. Instead, my video games interest has been replaced by tabletop gaming. Pathfinder, in particular. I'm proficient with the interwebz and memes and such, but internet culture in general disgusts me more and more as I get older. Yes, it's a true form of freedom, which is great, but it gives people an excuse to be cruel or deceiving from the safety of their own homes, and it hinders some people, especially kids, from learning any actual social skills. I think the future, in terms of technology and communication, is both an incredible and disappointing thing.

I'm easy to get along with, assuming that you don't mind frequent sarcasm. I'm usually sarcastic to a point of seeming arrogant or even downright stupid. Don't take it personally. Unless you're a complete jerk, I'll probably like you. I'm not racist, sexist, homophobic, or anything else like that. In fact, I seldom meet people I just don't like, and I try not to judge anyone for anything. Also, I never hold grudges. Life is too short to spend full of hate. If I can make someone smile, I feel like my day hasn't been a total waste. On that note, if you ever need someone to talk to, or a patient ear, don't be afraid to give me a shout. I'd be glad to talk. I don't really have any secrets. I might even be TOO open about things, at times.

Despite what you might be thinking, I usually don't take myself too seriously. Usually. I once had a friend tell me that I'm the type of guy who laughs WITH Beavis and Butthead, not at them. I would agree. I've been called strange, among many other things. I won't dispute that for a second. I've been told I have issues, but I prefer to think I'm just a bit eccentric. Either way, I'm harmless. I'm just trying to make my way through this crazy thing called life; living, learning, and doing my best to make every day count for something. I try to live without fear, and without regrets. I don't know everything there is to know about myself, and the more I learn, I think the less I understand. Then it just becomes a matter of rolling with it.

That should pretty much cover anything you could ever want to know about me... and probably a lot more. I mean, if there's anything else you want to know, I'd be surprised, since I've pretty much covered everything, but you could probably just ask me. Don't be shy. I don't bite... often. If you've read this whole thing, congratulations. You've earned yourself a Klondike Bar. Or a Coke. Or a friendly smile. Take your pick.

Peace always,


Add a Comment:
Kamiruchan015 Featured By Owner Dec 25, 2012  Professional Filmographer
Hey Niel, Thanks for the fave on [link] !
General-EbonRose Featured By Owner Feb 7, 2012  Student Digital Artist
Been awhile, but happy birthday, man.
NeilRawson Featured By Owner Sep 13, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
It certainly has... but thank you! =D Sorry I've become notorious for being on permanent hiatus.
Thy-Darkest-Hour Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanks so much for the :+fav: on my stock! Keep checking back, there's always more to come! :floating:
ShariCampbell Featured By Owner Jul 9, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
You made an awesome stamp. :D and you have pretty eyes. LOL
NeilRawson Featured By Owner Jul 29, 2011  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thank you! To both things. =P
ShariCampbell Featured By Owner Jul 29, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
x3 You're welcome!
kyrasayuri Featured By Owner Apr 15, 2011  Student
NeilRawson Featured By Owner Jul 29, 2011  Hobbyist Digital Artist
O hai.
kyrasayuri Featured By Owner Jul 29, 2011  Student
hi!!! glad you are back! I hope to see some work up here :D
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